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Don’t wait until it’s too late to get your priorities in order

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Message: If you are having trouble reading this email, you may view this article online at: http://www.jweekly.com/35398/full/35398/don-t-wait-until-it-s-too-late-to-get-your-priorities-in-order/ Don’t wait until it’s too late to get your priorities in order Friday, July 25, 2008 | by rabbi michelle fisher Matot Numbers 30:2-32:42 Jeremiah 1:1-2:3 “Cat’s in the Cradle.” The song is about a hard-working, bill-paying father who never quite finds the time to spend with his son, and then years later, the grown son cannot find the time to spend with his dad. I always find myself teary-eyed singing or listening to the lyrics. The song’s poignancy and deep sadness lie in the message of missed opportunities from misplaced priorities. This is not a new issue, nor just a modern challenge. In this week’s Torah portion, as the Israelites are on the far side of the Jordan River about to begin their conquest of the Promised Land, we learn a new fact about the tribes of Reuven and Gad. The Torah describes them as having “cattle in very great numbers.” Seeing that the trans-Jordan region is extremely suitable for cattle and other livestock, these two tribes approach Moshe with a request: Don’t move us across the river, let us inherit this land. Moshe is not overly pleased with the two tribes. “Are your brothers to go to war while you stay here?” Where is your sense of kinship? Are you really going to incense God further by rejecting this gift? For 40 years your ancestors have wandered and died in the wilderness to reach this land! You get to have choice land for free and without effort, but your fellow Israelites will need to conquer their holdings alone? Furthermore, your staying behind will discourage the others from moving ahead to the land promised by God. There is a long interchange, but in the end, an agreement is reached. The two tribes will fight alongside their brothers, helping them conquer the Promised Land. Then they will return to the land on the opposite side of the Jordan. Priorities back in line. Kinship and responsibility remembered — mostly. When Reuven and Gad made their plea, they state, “We will build here our sheepfolds for our flocks and towns for our children” (Numbers 32:16) and fight as shock troops to obtain the rest of Israel’s territory. Moshe responds with carefully chosen words, in specifically selected word order: “Build towns for your children and sheepfold for your flocks, but do as you have promised” (Numbers 32:24). A quick reader could easily pass over this and miss the change in wording as the Torah moves from the request to the answer. Yet it is huge. Reuven and Gad list their animals and farms first. Moshe states the children, the family and dependents, first. The commentator Rashi points out this subtle nuance in Moshe and the tribes’ dialogue as deserving of comment. The two tribes, by putting their wealth and their source of income first, are ordering their priorities wrong. Moshe is giving a reminder that it is one’s children who need to be foremost. I can almost hear the song being sung: “‘When you comin’ home, Dad?’” The strong criticism hidden in Moshe’s words is a critique that the tribes hear clearly, and immediately respond to: “Your servants will do as my lord commands. Our children, our wives, our flocks and all our other livestock will stay behind” (Numbers 32:25-26). The tribes make a promise to place their families first. Only then will they work on their livelihood, their material possessions represented by the cattle and sheepfolds. Can we hear Moshe’s critique to us today too? Can we respond as quickly, as vigorously and as completely as our tribal ancestors? Summertime is a more laid-back season for many of us. Let us use this time to recall that our jobs, our work, our money — as important as they all are — cannot replace face time and shared experiences with our families and friends, with the people whom we love and who are meaningful to us. I hope we all can find ways to reprioritize our lives to put those things that most matter at the forefront of how we use our time and energy. Rabbi Michelle Fisher is the spiritual leader of Congregation B’nai Shalom in Walnut Creek.

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