Your Email:

Friend's Email:

Note: (optional)

Subject:

Message: <br /><br /> If you are having trouble reading this email, you may view this article online at: http://www.jweekly.com/14329/full/14329/panelists-share-their-challenges-of-growing-up-in-interfaith-home/ <br /><br /> <b>Panelists share their challenges of growing up in interfaith home</b> <br /> Friday, October 27, 2000 | by <p>JOAN GROSS </p> <br /><br /><p>Children of interfaith marriages should be raised with one religion or the other, not both. Nor should they be raised without a religion. At least, that was the consensus of a panel discussion of Jews who had been raised by parents of two different religious backgrounds.<br /><br /> The recent event, sponsored by a number of Peninsula synagogues and Jewish organizations, was held at Peninsula Temple Beth El in San Mateo. About 50 people attended.<br /><br /> "I was raised with no religion, and it made my life very difficult," said panelist Lori Huddleston of San Francisco. "It is hard to pray with no tools and no support system. I had to struggle when I needed strength to worship God."<br /><br /> She and three other panelists led the discussion: "Having Our Say: Growing Up in an Interfaith Home." Dawn Kepler, outreach coordinator of Lehrhaus Judaica, served as moderator.<br /><br /> Panelist Madeleine Adkins of Oakland confided, "Since I had no religious upbringing, no community or culture, I feel I have missed out."<br /><br /> And Jeff Fry of Palo Alto added, "It is better to start with something than nothing. Then you can build your own platform."<br /><br /> For them, the path to Judaism has been long and winding.<br /><br /> In contrast to the other panelists, 15-year-old Dan Bauer of Belmont, is being raised Jewish. He has attended the Reform Peninsula Temple Beth El for a number of years. His mother is Catholic, and comes from a large family originating in Mexico.<br /><br /> Bauer sees his cousins from his maternal side regularly. There is a sharing of cultures: His family invites the others to join in their annual Chanukah celebration and, in turn, they attend Christmas and Easter festivities at his cousins'.<br /><br /> "They all came to my bar mitzvah," he said, "and I attend Mass with them on occasion, although I don't understand it."<br /><br /> Adkins told of growing up in a non-religious home; she celebrated Christmas and Easter as joyful, secular holidays. Her mother came from a non-traditional Jewish home, and her father was Protestant. There was nothing Jewish in the house.<br /><br /> "Although my mother told me that I was a Jew, I didn't understand the concept," said Adkins.<br /><br /> As an adult, however, she wondered what it meant to be Jewish. Following a move to Sacramento, she said, "I became interested in spirituality and community." Over the next five years Adkins studied Judaism intensely. "I felt left behind and cheated.<br /><br /> "Now I am settled into the Jewish community and feel grounded in Judaism."<br /><br /> Currently she is working on a documentary film about interfaith community. Titled "Double Roots," it is soon to be released.<br /><br /> As a child, Fry attended Unitarian church. "This background was more intellectual than spiritual," he said. Many families were interfaith like his own—his mother was Jewish, and his father came from a Congregational church tradition.<br /><br /> Fry's turning point came in college. After attending a unique Passover service, he decided to learn more about his Jewish roots. "Over the past 10 years I have explored Judaism in depth," he said. "I had a lot of catching up to do, including [learning] the melodies and learning Hebrew, which is really a challenge. I feel an ownership now of Judaism."<br /><br /> Huddleston gravitated to Judaism during her teenage years. Her mother came from a non-religious Jewish family, and her father from a Baptist one. They'd agreed to let their children choose their own religion. "My mom and I attended an 'Introduction to Judaism' class," Huddleston recalled, "and started practicing rituals at home."<br /><br /> The three adult panelists found it took them a number of years to feel comfortable with Judaism.<br /><br /> "After five years," Adkins said, "I didn't have to prove it to myself. Once I became involved with the temple I attended and joined the choir, I learned the songs."<br /><br /> For Huddleston, "It helped me to have great support from my mother and maternal grandmother."<br /><br /> Yet all the panelists agreed that a knowledge of other cultures is valuable. "I feel enriched by my mom's culture, and a close connection to my cousins," Bauer said.<br /><br /> Fry added, "We live in a multicultural world. As a Jew, I feel my life is enriched when I go and pray with friends of other faiths and traditions."<br /><br /> The event was sponsored by Interfaith Connection, a program of the Jewish Community Center of San Francisco; Lehrhaus Judaica's Building Jewish Bridges; Peninsula Temple Beth El, Peninsula Temple Sholom, Peninsula Sinai Congregation and Temple Beth Jacob.</p> <p> </p>

Please enter the letters and numbers you see in the image below: