Jokes

The general's memory

A non-Jewish army general lost his memory one day and believed he was Jewish. He also thought he could fly, so he had to be institutionalized.

In the mental hospital, he argued that he must be served only kosher food. Finally, unable to avoid the extra work and expense, the director of the institution acquiesced.

A few days later, on Shabbat, the director was strolling through the grounds, when he came upon the same patient sitting in a chair and smoking a cigar.

"Wait a minute, general," he said. "I thought you were so religious that we had to bring in special food for you. And now, here you are smoking a cigar on Shabbat!?"

"But doctor," the general replied. "Did you forget? I'm mishugah!"




Jake and Sadie

Jake came home from a hard day's work, sat down at the kitchen table and said to his wife, "Sadie, for once in your life don't start with your troubles. Ask, instead, what happened to me at business. Ask, already, what kind of day I had. Go ahead, ask. Just ask ... "

Whereupon Sadie asked apprehensively, "So what happened, Jake?"

Then, Jake buried his head in his hands, and said, "What happened? Oh, Sadie, better you shouldn't ask!"




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