Toledot
Genesis 25:19-28:9
Malachi 1:1-2:7
Rabbi Sampson Raphael Hirsch, the 19th-century leader of Germany Jewry, perceived all human development as hinging on the relationship between a person’s innate characteristics and the way he is educated.
A great case in point concerns the two sons of Isaac and Rebecca. Hirsch quotes Bereisheet Rabbah 63:14, observing that until the age of 13, Jacob and Esau attended the same school and were separated only later.
Hirsch uses this to voice strong criticism of the practice of educating all children in the same manner. Among other things he points out that our sages didn’t hold back from revealing the deficiencies in the behavior and philosophies of our forefathers. In this way our sages were able to enhance and expand their message for future generations.
It is suggested to us that by giving both twins an identical upbringing, their parents failed to take into account the extreme differences between them. Here our rabbis point out to us that we should be careful to follow the fundamental principal of education as laid down in Proverbs 22:6, “Train the youth in accordance with his way.”
As a teacher and a parent, I have become convinced that education must be directed according to the child’s special characteristics and latent tendencies in the depths of his soul. Although the objective is to educate the Jewish child toward a goal of a pure Jewish and human life, the ways it can be realized are many and varied in accordance with the diverse nature of mankind.
When the 12 sons of Jacob gathered together at the end of his life to receive their father’s blessings, he saw them as the future tribes of Israel. He didn’t envision them all as priests or religious leaders, but as a tribe of royalty, a tribe of merchants, a tribe of farmers, a tribe of warriors and so on. He saw the entire nation in front of him with all of its multifaceted qualities and in all the ways it would develop. He blessed them all “each one according to his blessing, he blessed them.” (Genesis 49:28)
The covenant that G-d had sealed with Abraham required a whole, healthy, fresh nation in all its many forms in order to direct them all to the one great task: to preserve the ways of G-d to act fairly and justly.
One who places Jacob and Esau on the same study bench and teaches them both the same way is almost guaranteed to ruin one of them. Jacob will draw from the well of wisdom with increasing desire, while Esau will only wait for the day when he can discard all the old books and with them the whole great purpose of life, which he only recognizes from one point of view — one that by his very nature he detests.
Perhaps if Rebecca and Isaac had penetrated into the soul of Esau, if they had questioned how the latent energy, strength and flexibility of Esau could be harvested toward the ways of G-d, the future “mighty man,” as he is known, might not have been merely an “excellent hunter.” Perhaps he might have become a mighty man of G-d. Jacob and Esau, with all their differences, might have remained brothers who complemented one another in their spirits and their lifestyles. Who knows what difference that would have made in history?
Alas, that was not the way it happened. Ultimately everyone was forced to acknowledge that even though the brothers came from the same mother’s womb and were educated and trained together, they were so totally different from each other in their actions.
Most parents know that their children seem to exhibit different temperaments, character traits and personalities from day one. It behooves us to acknowledge this, to analyze it and to seriously consider this in choosing the manner of educating our children.
The Torah teaches us that children are not one size fits all, and their upbringing must reflect this understanding in order to bring out their fullest potential and best qualities.
Shabbat shalom.
Rabbi Pinchas Lipner is dean of Hebrew Academy in San Francisco.