Undercover clergy

A minister, a priest and a rabbi went for a hike one day. It was very hot. They were sweating and exhausted when they came upon a small lake, and since it was fairly secluded, they took off all their clothes and jumped in the water.

Feeling refreshed, the trio decided to pick a few berries while enjoying their “freedom.” But as they were crossing an open area, who should come along but a group of ladies from town.

Unable to get to their clothes in time, the minister and the priest covered their privates and the rabbi covered his face while they ran for cover.

After the ladies had left and the men got their clothes back on, the minister and the priest asked the rabbi why he covered his face rather than his private parts. The rabbi replied, “I don’t know about you, but in my congregation, it’s my face they would recognize.”


Putting on the syrup

Mrs. Epstein was preparing pancakes for her young sons. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. She saw this as an opportunity for a moral lesson. “If our great teacher Moses were sitting here, he would say, ‘Let my fellow man have the first pancake. I can wait.’”

The oldest boy said, “You’re right, Mom.” He then turned to his younger brother and said, “You can be Moses.”


A special diet?

Freda goes to Harry the Kosher Butcher to buy her weekly portion of chicken. After looking at all the packs of chicken on display, she goes over to Harry and asks him, “Harry, I’d like to know how you feed your chickens.”

“Nu? So why do you want to know this information?” asks Harry.

“Because I would also like to be as thin as your chickens and to weigh so little,” Freda replies. n

© david minkoff