Tot chef: PJCC preschoolers bare-bones recipes offer bellyful of laughs

Rachael Ray and Jamie Oliver, watch out: When some extremely inventive would-be chefs at the Peninsula Jewish Community Center preschool in Foster City were asked to come up with their own culinary masterpieces, the results were surprising — to say the least.

Led by teachers Denise Gershenson-Johnston and Lori McLaughlin, the Dolphin class of 4- and 5-year-olds wrote recipes using only their imaginations. The PJCC published the results in a cookbook, along with real recipes that the group of 19 made together during the school year.

Some of the invented recipes follow. Note: j. staff has not tried out any of the recipes. Readers are advised to proceed with caution, particularly when instructions require 50 or more hours of microwaving.

Alexandra Childs, 41⁄2, whose Chocolate Date Cake calls for 20 pounds of flour, creates a dish here that’s a bit more modest.

Ethan Chien, 5
Mac ’n’ Cheese

Go to grocery store and buy cheese and macaroni.
Put cheese in macaroni.
Mix it up, put in pot.
Cook it for 50 hours.
Let it cool down and then eat it.

Danny Bellomy, 5
Magic Pancakes

1 magic pan.
3 bananas.
1 cup sprinkles.
1 scoop of chocolate chips and feathers from different birds to make the pancakes magic.
Pancake batter.
Flower Petals
Chocolate coins.
Foam letters.
Put in microwave for 50 hours.
You have to eat them when they are warm.

Benjamin Binder, 4½
Pumpkin Pie

Get some pumpkin.
1/2 cup sugar.
1 lb. of flour.
7 lbs. of cinnamon and a dash of pumpkin pie spice (not too much spice because I really don’t like too much spice).
Mix ingredients together.
Put into a pot, make it flat and then put it into the microwave for 60 minutes so it can turn more orange.
Take out and eat.

Jeremiah Saks, 5
Matzah Ball Soup

Put matzah in pot with bullion cubes, broth and then put on oven.
Take out and eat it.

Hailey Bello, 4
Lemon Cake

20 spoons of sugar.
1 spoon of oil.
3 spoons of flour.
1 bottle of lemon juice.
Put ingredients together and mix.
Put in pot and bake for 5 minutes.
Let cool and then eat.

Alexandra Childs, 4½
Chocolate Date Cake

Put chocolate in it!
Put dates in it.
1 lb. of sugar.
4 lbs. of butter.
20 lbs. of flour.
5 eggs.
1 teaspoon of cinnamon.
Put together in a bowl and mix it really hard.
Transfer to pie dish, put in oven and bake for 20 hours.
Remove it from the oven, let it cool, then eat.

Ethan Belloni, 4½

Buy it from the store.
Take it home for dinner.
Cook it and when it’s ready eat it.

Alec Ianchulev, 4
Cucumber Soup

2 whole cucumbers.
1 whole tomato.
16 carrots.
Put in broth of hot chocolate.
Stir for 252 minutes.

Talia Bakhshi, 5
Mac ’n’ Cheese

Dump mac ’n’ cheese from box into pot.
Add 1 gallon of milk, dump cheese from package into pot.
Stir together. Put in bowl and then take a bite.

Audrey Lee, 5
Spaghetti and Meatballs

Tomato sauce.
Stick pasta in a pot for 10 minutes.
Put it on a plate.

Jadyn Davis, 5
Chocolate Cake

4 cups of chocolate flour.
Water, then stir.
Add wheat bread.
Put in oven for 30 minutes.
Frost with my favorite frosting — vanilla.

Sophia Park, 4½
Chocolate Pie

3 lbs of blueberry yogurt.
Measuring spoons.
2 eggs.
5 candy bars.
1 scoop of sugar.
2 scoops of flour.
1 scoop of honey.
Mix together in a pot.
Put in oven for 1 minute then eat so you can go to sleep.

Parker Pilotte, 5

Boil it.
Cook it.
Eat it.
Ashley Pedro, 4
Chocolate Chip Cookies
Go to the store and get some chocolate chips and some batter.
Roll dough flat, put chocolate chips in batter.
Put batter in pan that is flat.
Put flat pan in oven for 40 minutes.
Take out and eat the cookies!

Sophia Cohen, 4½
Shortbread Cookies

1 piece of bread.
1 big tablespoon of honey.
Mix together.
Put ingredients on a towel.
Put in oven for 8 minutes.
Take out and eat it.

Will Fowler, 5
Scetti (spaghetti) and Sauce

You need water inside a pot.
Then put scetti on top of water.
Cook it for 7 days.
Take off stove. Let it cool.
To make sauce:
4 onions.
7 pickles.
1 pear.
2 tomatoes.
Smash them together and then put them on top of scetti.

Elias Mitchell, 5

You put it in the microwave and that’s it, then you eat it.

Brynn Toomasson, 4½ Quesadilla
Cheese — shredded.

Put in microwave for 5 minutes.
Add chicken that’s been chopped.
Karla Lukin, 4½
Salad with big tomatoes.
7 mushrooms.
8 potatoes.
8 cups of currants.
8 cups of grape juice.
Spread ingredients all over the table.
Mix together in a big bowl.
Eat with a large piece of matzah.